Tuesday, February 08, 2005

stayin' alive

So i did one of the hardest things I've had to do this year so far. I quit youth. Seriously, when i say that i love youth, i REALLY REALLY do. Unfortunately, i decided in amongst the rambling i did in yesterday's post, that today had to be a new and changed day. (WOW - ick, i remind myself of DR PHIL.) But something has to change if i don't want to go the way of the padded walls, and youth is pretty much the only thing in my week that i can give up. so i did. and i want to cry. But Brian needs me for the Fernie trip (how can there be a shortage of girl leaders on a trip to fernie you ask? I have no idea.) So at least i'll be able to spend that last bit of time hanging with people then. AND i get to go try snowboarding again... hope i don't die!
Somebody said something on Sunday night that really impacted me: it is not shameful to fail. In a lot of ways i feel like i'm failing by not fitting in everything i try to do in a week, but its ok. Going crazy is just not doing what i'm being called to do. I know i have a specific calling and purpose, and when i step back and let God work through me, instead of trying to be superwoman and do his job for him, or feel better about myself by being constantly busy, then I can be the woman God created me to be. comforting thought.

But i should get going, need to finish my application forms for education and get some stuff done for C&C.
in his grip.
c

1 comment:

rochelle laura knox said...

sawadee kha! that's hello in thai. (well for a girl - if you're a boy you have to end it with kup and not kha). well done quitting. i am impressed. it is important to do a few things very well then everything so-so. (though i have noticed that you have an amazing ability of doing everything excellently but then you burn yourself out and that is sad). you know what i always say: it's about focusing. choose what you will input into (whether it is people, programs...) and give it all your attention. that's when friendships can thrive. p.s. i miss you! ;)